Dark and cold.
It was the cold that awakened me. Peeking out from under the heavy layer of blankets, the frigid air was like a slap in the face.
Slipping on a turtleneck and fleece pants, I quickly ventured downstairs. The air was surprisingly colder than upstairs. Fearing that someone had accidentally turned down the thermostat, I hurried into the dining room.
No. The thermostat was set solidly at 69 degrees and yet the furnace was quiet. Opening the utility door closet I was given a hearty “good morning” by the ominous flashing of the green emergency light.
The furnace blower fan had malfunctioned. It was, in fact, burnt out. Perhaps caused by the constant non-stop running due to the abnormally frigid temperatures we’ve been experiencing over the past two weeks. For whatever reason, it was no more…
What next?
The lingering odor of raw sewage still permeates the frigid air. We haven’t been able to bathe, launder or wash dishes for three days now. No plumber available until Monday. The furnace part must be ordered. The two kerosene heaters are struggling to stave off the intense cold, but can’t quite keep up.
What to do? Well…the Ingalls family certainly knew how to deal with the hand that had been dealt. As Pa would frequently utter when faced with adversity: “Needs must when the devil drives…” In other words, when bad things happen, you must go forward because you simply can’t go back.
And so forward we go. Which means this:
When every dish in your house is dirty you fill two of your largest pans with hot water. One for wash and one for rinse. Huddled beside the kerosene heater, you wash and rinse. You lay the dishes upon a clean towel and marvel at the sweet little six year old who gleefully joins you, towel in hand, to dry.
“It’s just like living in olden times, Mommy!” she excitedly exclaims.
Ah, that I had that enthusiasm! We are certainly not strangers to inconvenience, but I always marvel at the children who handle it so much better than I. They are real troopers and simply accept that this is what we must do…so we do it.
I’m praying for a quick resolution to these “inconveniences.” I feel grumpy and irritated by the tools that are used to lead me to holiness. Would that I could relax in the hands of the Master as He works on me, whittling away at my frustration and desire to control the uncontrollable. To be the fixer.
Ah, the white martyrdom of motherhood. So many suffer so much more than I, and yet the “I” is ever present as I try to not cry, frown and complain grow in virtue in this new trial.
And so here’s to “living like olden times.” Back to the kitchen. The cold, dirty and grace-filled kitchen where I will continue to “work out my salvation in fear and trembling…”
It’s so cold in there, I think I have the trembling part down pat…
Blessings,
who wishes she was more like Laura Ingalls Wilder!
I am a traditional Catholic homeschooling mother of 9 children, married for 30 years to the most patient and sainted man. As converts to Catholicism in 1991, our family has only recently discovered the beauty and full expression of our beliefs in the timeless liturgy of antiquity, the Extraordinary Form also commonly referred to as the Traditional Latin Mass. An avid knitter, I also enjoy gardening, reading and immersing myself in the everyday graces of my vocation.
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You were missed this morning at church and I wondered… I had a feeling the cold weather was the culprit of something! Well, our dishwasher is on the fritz and our heating is still not working right but we’ll of course keep moving forward!
By the way, I have a new winter cap that looks like a snowball. LOL.. I was thinking that a certain little girl would have laughed if she saw it!
Praying for that part to get to you quickly!
Kimberly, I so admire how you keep your sense of humour in this ‘Job’ time you are enduring. I’d love to help, or at least invite you over for a rest in our sunshine but as I can’t…I’m praying.
My eyes welled up with tears as I read this. How my heart feels for you. We all can relate to “I feel grumpy and irritated by the tools that are used to lead me to holiness.” I wish good wishes and hugs could make this all disappear for you and that you’d get a “break”.
You’re courage and determination to try and make the best of it are inspiring. God must love you dearly, to send you so many crosses, all at once. He knows you’ll offer them up and benefit yourself and those arpound you through the many graces you’ll obtain in presevering and carrying these crosses.
You are in my prayers. I’m starting a novena tomorrow to the Scared Heart for you and family but especially for your surgery to be a complete success. The rest of the family is praying for you also.